I'm serious. A candidate for Oklahoma State School Superintendent by the name of Bill Crozier really wants to pursue this idea, whether he wins the election or not.
My first reaction was to laugh out loud. I really couldn't help myself. The thought of kids and teachers in a Columbine-type setting crouching behind their textbooks or trying to decide which vital body part to cover with them was just a little too ludicrous for my warped sense of humor.
Then, of course, as I related this story to Mrs. Woody, I realized that it's really my sense of horror that we even need to consider such a thing that is my overriding reaction. In fact, it was the memory of Columbine and numerous other shooting tragedies that sobered me up pretty quickly.
I just can't see this idea adding any real protection to kids around the country. For one thing, it will drive the already prohibitive cost of educational texts sky high. Can you just hear the order clerk? "Will that be with or without the armor-piercing-resistant cover?" For another, I have a hard time imagining that kids are going to take time to think about hiding behind a textbook while in the midst of an all-out panic. How much would a bullet-resistant textbook weigh in comparison with today's glorified paper-weights? Think the kids are having back pains today? Just wait.
All I know is that guns are not an issue here at Wonderwood Academy. Neither, fortunately, are bullet-proof textbooks.
The Senate health care bill: Yuval Levin’s take
4 hours ago